OK, it is time to get real...and 100% back on track.
I have not written a post in quite a while and I appoligize for that. The reason I have not been posting much is that I have not been doing so great with my nutrition and I am kind of embarassed about it. I thought that the OLD ME and her way of eating was gone, but apparently she wanted to remind me that she is not completely gone.
There have been many temptations during the holidays. Not so much at home but mostly at work. I have given in to way too many of them and I am not really happy with myself for doing that. We had families bringing in sweets like boxes and boxes and boxes of chocolate, cakes, cookies and pie. I have eaten pizza, chinese food and things that are quick to make at home. Now usually things that are quick to make are not that nutritious and are full of salt. sugar and fat. My body was used to getting lots of nutritious food which it used as fuel. Eating the unhealthy food during Christmas left my body really tired as it did not have the fuel it was used to getting.
I still went to the gym every day that I was not working and that it was open. But I shortened up my workouts a bit. I went to the gym with some other people and I did not want them to have to wait for me to finish so I shortened up my workouts. (I know...it really is just an excuse). I have been concentrating on my weights because I absolutely LOVE lifting weights, so I always do them first. I would run out of time and end up only doing about 20 minutes of cardio. I know that I need an even mix of cardio and weights and I guess I didn't plan my workouts as well as I should.
Speaking of planning...that is where I went really wrong over the holidays. I really did not plan my workouts the way I had been and I certainly did not plan my diet the way that I know I should be doing. For me, in order to succeed...I NEED TO PLAN! I know that I need to plan and I know how to plan. I just didn't do it! That is going to stop right here, right now! I will tell you about my plan to succeed in another post to come later tonight or tomorrow.
Now for the part that I am most embarassed about. My weight...Oh Dear!
Ok, so my weight yesterday was 222.6 lbs and if you remember what my weight was before Christmas you will know that I did not do so well. Before Christmas I was 218.8 lbs. Now for the real truth. I have already let go of 6 lbs that I have put on over the holidays. So that means that I put on a total of 10.8 lbs over the holidays. It is not something that I am proud of, I was actually really disappointed in myself which is one of the reasons that I continued to eat whatever was in front of me. But you know what, I have since let go of those feelings of disappointment and discouragement with myself and I have moved on. Now I am focusing on where I am going with my health in the future and letting go of the past.
Now, here is a little something about myself that some of you may know and some of you may not...depending on how well you know me. I have this desire or need to do everything that I do, perfectly. When I feel that I did not do my best at something, I get really down on myself and I find it hard to get over my imperfection. I don't like making mistakes or doing something wrong. I really just want to do everything perfectly and no one is perfect. It is hard to live up to the standards that I have set for myself. I need to learn to accept and deal with my imperfections in a healthy way. Does anyone know how I can do that?? One thing that I do do well, is learn from my mistakes. I usually analyse my mistakes to see what I did not do correctly and I make sure to learn how I can prefent it from happening again.
So, what did I learn from all this...I have learned that I really need to plan for success!
My next few posts will be about my holidays, how I spent Christmas and New Years and about my Plan for Success...so stay tuned!
Dawn
you have always been and will continue to be a beautiful person, inside and out. when you make a mistake you are still beautiful. making a 'mistake' is how we humans learn about ourselves:our capabilities, limitations and about what we want and do not want in life; in ourselves and other people.
ReplyDeletestaying true to oneself is all we can do. it is then that we can soar above all those feeling of inadequacy(which we ALL have) and be there for others and to help them be as happy and healthy as they can be also.
you have great compassion for others.
continue as you are, you are already 'perfect'
You are so right, making mistakes is how we grow as a person and learn about ourselves and I use every mistake I make to do just that.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your kind words...they brightend up my day!
My God girl, it's like you're in my head!! We have been going through exactly the same things at the same time, from the first day i started reading your blog I have totally understood everything you've been going through...if i were writing a blog I swear I would just have to copy and paste yours and it would perfectly describe everything I've been feeling.
ReplyDeleteDon't beat yourself up about making mistakes, I have the same issues...maybe that has something to do with why we were overweight to begin with...you have come so far and have so much to be proud of, don't let a small bump in the road get you down. It's over, let's get on with it!!
If it makes you feel like your not alone, I gained 8 lbs over the holidays and hopefully when I weigh in tomorrow night I will have taken most of that back off. It feels good to be back on track.
One of my former trainers told me that weight loss is not easy, it's a journey not a destination and there will always be bumps and struggles along the way, consider it a test of character.
I'm really glad you're back on track...see you at the gym!
Cheryl
It is so nice to know that I am not alone in my struggles. Let's hope we will be together on the road to success this year. Actually, let's not hope...Let's do it!
ReplyDeleteThat trainer is so right. Weight loss is a life long journey...let's hope it is not too bumpy from here on!
I am happy to hear that you are back on track too! I will definately see you at the gym.
Take care,
Dawn